Wreck and Rule
by Aurrawings
Summary: This is the story of a femme, battle-hardened and scarred, finally broken by the years of torturous loss at the hands of the Decepticons. After a close call when she makes the wrong decision, the mech who saved her life and gave her a second chance brings her to the Wreckers, her new family. Slow-build, T for later violence and dark thoughts
1. Loss

** Hey all I"m back! I hope you take the time to read this as it's something that I was thinking of doing for a while. This won't be possible without TimeLordBud, so thanks for your help so far :3 Anyway, this first chapter is sort of an introduction, and I was inspired by Linkin Park's "Breaking the Habit," go look it up, you won't be sorry XD this is planned to be fairly long, and it will be a slow build with the help of TimeLord, so I hope you all like it! (warning this chapter contains suicidal thoughts)**

…

Ch. 1 Loss

She'd always told herself that no matter what happened, she could be beaten, not broken. Now, she knew she was wrong. As she sat in her dark quarters, relieved of duty due to a failed mental evaluation, her mind slipped to the recent past.

Bright flashes of memories and flashbacks invaded her senses. Gunfire, screams, the sting of wounds, and the sensation of energon slicking the ground with every step. With a roar, she heard the sound of Seeker jets as vividly if they'd just flown over the command center she was residing in. Further back in her memories, a kind word, gentle face, and soft touch were brought to her mind before it faded away. Outside her recognition, the door to her quarters hissed open and a familiar face walked in.

With a snap, she pulled back to her senses and blinked a few times, her one good optic cycling in the darkness. Footsteps tapped close to her, but she stayed in her position; elbows on her knees, hands clasped, helm bowed. A reassuring touch landed on her shoulder, but she involuntarily flinched away. The voice that followed was understanding but carried authority of its own.

"Hayli...when was the last time you refueled, or slept, or moved for that matter?" the visitor said. Hayli kept her gaze fixed on the floor, the newcomer was on her blind side anyway.

"Your energon levels are unacceptable, please Hayli, don't make me drag you to the med-bay and force it into you." the female Autobot remained rigid, but spoke in a voice ripped with grief and depression.

"Go away, Ratchet." Hayli said. Ratchet sighed and lifted the femme's chin to look him in the eye. She automatically turned her head to the left to hide her blind side; a Decepticon had damaged her left optic irreparably and left her face badly scarred.

"Come on, up you get." Ratchet said, pulling her up onto her feet slowly. Her joints creaked in stiffness and she looked away from Ratchet's red and white frame.

"Good Primus...what's happened to you Hayli?" Ratchet said after he used a small scanner on the femme, finding that she hadn't recharged for so long it was astounding her systems were still functioning. "Why haven't you been sleeping?" Hayli looked at the ground still, her mind numb to his questioning.

"If I sleep I just see it all again..." she murmured, standing on weak legs in the dimness of her quarters. Ratchet shaking his helm.

"I think I'm going to have to order you stay in the med-bay for a while, until you're energon levels are satisfactory and you've gotten enough rest. Do you think you can walk there?" Ratchet asked. Hayli gave a small nod, shuffling out into the bright and pristine hallway with the medic right behind. Her bladed heels tapped on the ceramic floor as she took one step at a time, having to stop and rest against the wall at one point to regain her bearings as she was so weak. At that point, Ratchet stepped forward and helped her, pulling one of her arms across his shoulders and walking her slowly to the med bay.

The doors slid open automatically with little to no noise, leading to the brightly lit medical area inside. Ratchet helped the ailing femme to an exam table in the back corner of the med bay, letting her sit on the edge while he gathered the few things he'd need. Hayli's gaze remained fixed on the floor, numbly staring at whatever was directly in her line of sight. When Ratchet glanced back at her he couldn't help but feel sympathy. She'd developed the 'thousand yard stare' that he'd seen countless times in bots that came in from combat situations. The bot sitting in front of him was the prime example of what it is to be broken deeper than what can be fixed with energon and rest.

Even so, he gently turned her so her legs were on the table and then lowered the femme so she was resting flat on her back. Her unfocused gaze drifted right past Ratchet up to the ceiling, where she didn't even blink though she was staring into a bright light. Ratchet sighed quietly, thinking that it was really a shame that she'd been reduced to a shell of her former glory. She'd worked her aft off to slowly climb through the Autobot ranks and become an elite guard officer, not to mention she was quite formidable on the battlefield. In one fluid motion, he connected an energon line to the refueling port on the back of her wrist, knowing there was no way to get her to do it herself.

"There, now, why don't you try and power off for a while, you need it badly." Ratchet said. Hayli didn't seem to acknowledge she heard him, until a few long moments later she whispered similar to what she'd said before.

"I don't want to see it again..." she said. Ratchet shook his head.

"I understand that...but Hayli, we've all lost someone we love, every one of us." Ratchet said, trying to rationalize with the femme even as he prepared a sedative to inject into her energon line; she'd get the rest she needed without having to worry about a flashback. He'd struck a nerve though, and her optic narrowed a fraction.

"Have every one of you watched your whole family murdered? Lost contact with your spark mate recently? Or watched a piece of your own spark die before your optics? I have." Hayli said coldly. Ratchet stood with the decent sized dose of the sedative, about to reply.

"We're truly sor-" Ratchet started before Hayli snapped, actually turning her head and glaring with her one good optic.

"Don't you 'sorry' me. Little more than a week ago the Decepticons took someone else away from me, she died _in my arms_, Ratchet. My own daughter!" she cried, her tone rising as she started re-living the trauma. Ratchet quickly injected the sedative, letting her continue. "I sat there in a pool of her energon while she went offline and those... _fragging Seekers_ … just kept shooting everything! You know what I came out of that fight with? A slagging... scratch on my arm guard... from a Seeker's talon..." she said, trailing off slightly. Ratchet could tell the sedative was taking effect, and she looked like she wanted to say something else before her frame relaxed and her head lolled, the optic glazing and going dim as she lost consciousness.

The old medic sighed as he left her to recharge and refuel, he had more patients to tend to and it seemed like the empty berths on either side of the femme would soon be filled.

…..

Long hours later, Hayli woke slightly disoriented in the now-dim med bay. She assumed it must have been night time, the lights turned down to allow the healing bots in the medical center to rest. With dismay, she ran a diagnostic scan and found she was back to operating at full capacity. The femme sat up, feeling the energon line in her wrist tug. Scowling, she ripped it out and swung her legs over the side of the table.

Why had Ratchet let her live to continue her mental suffering? Flashbacks tore through her mind once more and her spark ached deeply, almost to the point of physical pain. Angry and dejected, she stood up quickly and slipped out from behind a medical green curtain that had been pulled around the small corner of the med bay. A handful of mechs were recharging on tables around the bay, but no medic was to be seen.

Running a quick check, the femme was surprised to find she was still armed, her katana that was gifted in her training was sheathed safely at her side. Sneaking out of the med bay, she turned the corner around the hall and walked past her quarters towards the exit of the compound, thinking quietly to herself.

_Everyone thinks I can move on...but these memories I live with now... I don't want to fight anymore, but the fighting seems to find me anyway, and everytime I clash with those... Decepticons... _she mentally spat the word, _I lose something or someone close to me... What's the worth of fighting now? No one would listen to a grief stricken femme, even if I knew exactly what I wanted to say to stop them. I've said some horrible things to the ones I call my friends...how they can forgive me, I have no idea. _

She pulled from her thoughts to look around cautiously as she approached the door. At this hour, not many were awake save the skeleton crew on night watch. She picked up her pace to a run and exited the automatic doors, leaping forward and transforming in midair. With a thud and squeak of suspension springs, Hayli landed on all four tires and coasted forward a few feet to a stop, looking behind her in the rearview mirror to assure there was no one after her. All was quiet.

_I can't be in this place anymore. _The thought echoed.

With a screech of spinning tires, Hayli shot forward in vehicle mode, whipping off the road immediately and easing up to her maximum speed as she headed for someplace where she could get lost.

Hours passed with the femme never letting up on her accelerator. Warnings were starting to flash across her HUD that she was burning energon too quickly and her engine was redlining. She would've kept going until she flamed out, but her left front tire hit something embedded in the hard packed earth and lifted the front of her alternate mode off the ground, starting to roll her. Transforming in an instant, she landed and slid before coming to a stop. She gritted her teeth, clenching her fists so hard the pointed tips of her fingers started cutting into her palm. The warnings still flashed weakly, fading, but Hayli could feel her spark thrumming hard in her chest and she was cycling air heavily in an attempt to cool down her systems.

She looked back the way she came, getting up to her feet. Narrowing her good optic, she walked to the object that had almost wrecked her. It was the rusted wing of a Seeker, half sticking out of the ground at an angle. Hayli took a step back, clutching her helm as more flashbacks plagued her memory.

_These memories...they... _hurt_... more than any wound I've ever received. _Hayli said, letting her hand slide down her face as the memory attack faded. Rusty and twisted ruins rose high in front of her, she'd stopped at an old battle-ruined Decepticon city. Looking up at the tall spires, her mind took a dramatic shift, one from the loss of her mate and child to the question: what if I could be with them too?

Still despondent but with the spark of contemplation growing to a flame and heading quickly to an inferno, the femme walked over the cracked street and through the twisted ruins, noting the possibilities they held. She paused at a cement wall that was streaked in long-dried energon and had several claw marks from Seeker talons. She held up her hand and placed it on the cool surface over a slash mark, leaving a small smear of fresh energon from where her own digits had sliced open her hand.

"It's my fault you're dead, I should've..." Hayli said, blaming herself as she slid her hand from the stone and leaped into a small clear area.The dust skidded in small eddies around her feet as her heels cut thin prints into the ground. A large drop-off some yards away caught her attention and she walked towards it, standing on the edge and looking down.

Darkness was the first greeter, the hole was obviously a combination of a building collapse and an artillery crater, and it was extremely deep. Hayli flicked on the headlights set in her shoulders and knelt on the edge of the hole, peering down. The high powered lights cut into the blackness and revealed huge twisted spires of metal at the bottom from support beams, some had been sheared in half and left them as jagged points rising to the dusty sky. Hayli stood, her mind finally just letting go.

"That was my last fight...and this...is my end..." she said in a whisper to herself. Hayli drew her katana from her hip, raising it over her head and plunging the honed tip into the ground at the lip of the crater, more as her final grave marker than anything else. She slowly slid her hand from the hilt she'd become so comfortable with and had fought so many battles holding tightly to it. Tilting her head to the sky, she looked up at the faint outline's of Cybertron's two moons, holding their beauty as the last thing in her mind, she slipped off the edge.

Completely expecting to feel a spire punch through her frame in a few moments, she was unprepared when her fall was abruptly stopped by a hand wrapping around her wrist. Her momentum caused her to thump against the wall of the crater, and she whipped her gaze up to the interloper. Hope surged in her spark when she saw the white hand supporting her, but as her gaze traveled upwards it was quickly crushed out. The mech that had stopped her fall she did not recognize; he was lying on his chest over the edge of the crevasse, his hand clutching her arm. With little effort, he pulled her back over the side and sat her a ways away on the dirt. The white and red mech, similar in color to her mate but much different in design, silently went to her katana buried in the ground and released it from its intended resting place. Hayli kept her gaze numbly on the ground, a small piece of her mind realizing the mech made no noise while he walked.

"I think this is yours? It's a beautiful sword, more well crafted than my own." her 'rescuer' said, kneeling on the ground and offering her sword to her in both hands. Hayli took it without a word, shifting around and sheathing it on her left hip.

"Why did you do that? Why save me when you don't know me?" Hayli asked, not looking up at the mech kneeling in front of her.

"I could've let you fall, but there's...something about you that intrigued me. You carry yourself with grace and pride, even though your mind is clouded enough to prompt you to take your own life. I noticed you don't make a sound either, and with your weapon, well, I think it's safe to assume you trained as a cyber-ninja. I trained myself in the ways, but I'm surprised you never caught on to my presence." he said.

"Well, when all you can think about is your own sparkling being murdered before your eyes, but not after losing contact with your spark mate completely, it's a little bit hard to concentrate on your surroundings." Hayli growled. "To whom do I owe the 'pleasure' of having my life?" she said, threat woven into her voice.

"I'm called Drift, didn't used to be...but that's a story for another time." he said, getting to his feet and holding out his hand to her. "You've obviously got a story to tell too, come. If you thought it the time to end your existence, why not start a new one?" Drift said. The broken femme hesitated, then placed her hand in his and was helped to her feet. She only then realized that the small wounds on her palm had broken open and were bubbling energon, as well as a gash she hadn't felt on her thigh that was oozing as well. It must have gotten there when she smacked into the crater wall. Drift noticed and dropped her hand.

"I've got a friend that can fix those." Drift said, putting a hand to his commlink. "Kup, this sector is clear, but I'm bringing someone back...no she's not a prisoner...tell Perceptor we need his medic skills for a few moments when we get there... no...that's not..." he sighed deeply, rubbing a hand across his faceplate, "just send us a bridge, alright?...okay?... see you in a few." Drift said, disconnecting. Hayli looked at him with a raised optic ridge, and noticed with surprise that he wasn't staring at her empty optic socket like most, though she didn't have time to say anything before a ground bridge swirled open in front of them.

"Follow me." Hayli did as she was told, stopping at the very edge of the bridge.

"Where...where are we going?" she asked. Drift looked over his shoulder with a small smirk.

"Ever heard of the Wreckers?"

….

**Well, this took much longer to write than I expected, but I'm fairly happy with the turnout. Don't worry, I know there was a lot of sadness and depression in this first chapter but that's nothing like Hayli's personality usually is. You'll get to meet the real side of her a while later. I hope you all like this as much as I liked writing it, and I love when people write reviews! I respond to them all (unless it's a guest XD)**


	2. Chapter 2

** Thank you to Alex Maria Johnson for being my first review! You rock! On to the next chapter then, and thanks to all who viewed/favorited/followed as well!**

**I have also decided the theme song for this fic (which I DO NOT own)**

**Into the Nothing – Breaking Benjamin (go look it up, it held a lot of meaning for me relating to this fic)**

…**.**

Hayli followed Drift's white frame through the bridge, feeling a dull ache in her leg but ignoring it without so much as a limp. On the other side, she took in the military-type command center they'd entered. Doors lead off the semi-circular room, where they went she didn't know. The front curve of the room was almost wall to wall windows, sunshine was beaming in as well, bright contrast to the darkness of the very early morning time she'd just come from.

A handful of mechs were standing around the room, the sunlight glinting off their frames made their flaws that more obvious. Not a single mech wasn't battle scarred, and though their optics held curiosity as they looked at the femme, their faces were hard. Drift himself had old wounds still visible in his frame; at least in the injury department, Hayli didn't feel out of place with these mechs. Her obvious missing optic and heavily scarred face usually prompted stares, but none of the ones in the room seemed to notice. Drift walked in front of her, joining the group of mechs.

"What are you thinking bringing a stranger here, Drift?! And a femme at that!" a pale blue-green, old looking bot said. He'd been leaning on a console smoking a cigar and now had removed it, casting a pointed glance towards the femme.

"Save it, Kup." A larger deep green mech chided, turning his attention to the femme standing tall in the command center. She kept her chin raised in defiance, her face not showing any emotion. The green mech's posture and voice carried authority as well, she assumed he was in charge and was correct.

"My name's Springer, I command these bunch of rust buckets; you know Drift, apparently; the old timer over there is Kup, Perceptor's the red mech over there at the other console, and Blurr is out on patrol. He'll be back soon I'm sure." Springer explained, his voice was authoritative but gentle. He sensed there was something broken in this bot, much like there was in all of his soldiers. He gently prodded her for information.

"What's your name, stranger, and rank, if you have one?" Springer asked. Hayli adjusted her posture slightly to an 'at ease' position, showing Springer she had a military background.

"My designation is Hayli, rank sergeant in the Elite Guard and graduating 3rd in my class at the academy. I possess extensive knowledge of cyber-ninja training and my battle rating was ranked above average. My soldier identification number is 033-945722." Hayli rattled off. Springer was impressed that a femme such as her worked so hard to get a military position after years of difficult ninja training, he wondered what happened to the female bot standing before him to end up here.

The Wreckers always needed more recruits, ones that were tougher than the rest and preferably had nothing to lose. They were as close knit, if not closer, as a family and always had each other's backs; to be a part of the Wreckers meant that your unit trusted you whole-sparkedly.

"I see, that all sounds impressive, but... Drift wouldn't bring you here unless you had nowhere else to go. May I ask what prompted your arrival?" Springer asked. Hayli felt her spark clench and she dropped her head away from the commander. She spoke clearly but was too ashamed to look in his direction.

"I... I lost a sparkling about ten days ago. It was supposed to be a small skirmish over some energon, she fought at my side for most of the battle...but none of us knew the cons would bring in their Seekers. It was...a slaughter..." Hayli trailed off. Springer didn't offer any false apologies or try and sympathize, he knew all about loss like the rest of his team and also knew empty words held no value.

"I see... yes, I heard of that battle, there were a lot of casualties." Springer said. Hayli nodded silently.

"Too many... I lost contact with my spark mate a short time before that and I suppose without either of them...I lost my will to keep going. I...I tried to take the coward's way out." she said guiltily. When Springer raised an optic ridge, Drift stepped in.

"I caught her when she tried to fall into a spiked crater, I'd been watching her from a distance for some time, my judgment was to prevent her from taking her own life and give her the option to join us." Drift said, adding quickly to Springer, "That is, if you find her of value." Springer gave a small nod to the white mech, stepping up to the femme, who was a bit shorter than him but not much, and he noted it.

"You're tall for a femme," he said, walking in a circle around her, "sturdier too. Definitely a four-wheeler." he said, stopping in front of her again. He'd noticed the small gash on her thigh, though she seemed to ignore it completely despite the energon that was still tacky and not finished clotting.

"It was my choice to be of a bigger stature, it allows me to subdue my targets with greater ease." Hayli said in vague explanation. Springer cocked his helm a bit, a small smile playing on his face. He liked this femme and her spunk, and he didn't doubt her ordeals either, that was one thing he new for sure. Her value, especially as an assassin, could exponentially increase their odds, and besides, a sister in a band of brothers was always a welcome addition.

"I see..." he said. Springer was interested in her as one of the few femmes he would consider as a true Wrecker at Spark, but he wanted to test her first. Without another word, he drew his sword and gave a backhanded slash at her. His slight shift in his center of balance had alerted Hayli to his going for his weapon, and she ducked smoothly backwards, the blade missing her by a safe margin. She was slightly confused as to why the seemingly kind mech had turned hostile, and searched for an answer in his optics, but they held nothing.

The other Wreckers backed to the outsides of the room, giving their leader space. They'd seen Springer's initiation methods more than once, and knew they must not interfere. Hayli drew her own katana and held it in a two handed grip in front of her, shifting into a battle stance and assessing her opponent. Springer noted the bright and intelligent intensity the femme regarded him with, and could tell she was picking him apart with her gaze. He made a feigned leap for her, trying to bait her into coming after him, but she didn't do much more than flinch when his charge fell short.

In the one moment Springer was off-balanced, the femme rushed. She could have easily stabbed him through the spark, but her sword was flipped into a backhand position in her left hand as she drove the heel of her hand upwards under the bottom of his chin with more force than he thought she would exert. His denta clacked loudly together with the impact, and in the next movement she'd grabbed his sword arm and spun behind him, twisting his hand painfully as she swept his leg out from under him, forcing Springer to kneel with his arm pulled behind his back. A swift kick to the end of the hilt of his sword sent it out of his hand and his weapon spun across the smooth floor. Hayli released the larger green mech's arm and shoved him forward with her foot.

Springer stumbled forward and spun around to see the femme cast her own sword away and widen her center of balance, beckoning him forward. The ache quickly left Springer's arm, but he was impressed. The femme was _fast_ and she knew how to fight. He could tell she was trying not to seriously injure him, but she wasn't holding back much more than that. He'd made the mistake of underestimating her, but now he'd be ready. Springer also noticed something that could be a weakness of hers, not to mention the minor wound she'd come in with.

As he circled her, looking for an opening, Springer noticed she subtly tried to keep him out of her blind side, even if she didn't turn her whole body or even her head. Using this to his advantage, while he was behind her, he dodged to her blind side and like expected, she turned towards him. Ducking to her other side, he used his bigger size and shouldered into her hard, expecting to unbalance her, but instead of pushing back like he was used to, Hayli went with the hit and leaped lightly to the side, landing on her toes and springing forward to her once-again unbalanced foe.

Springer ducked aside, his pedes skidding on the floor as he whirled to face the femme again. As she herself was regaining her balance, he sprung and landed a hard jab to her face, followed by a punch in her stomach plating, doubling her over instantly. He was meaning to incapacitate her, and see just how much she could take in battle. She went forward with her shift and planted her hands on the ground, planning on springing off to a safe distance. As she did, Springer was faster and grabbed her foot as her heel was on a planned trajectory for his helm. Twisting, he spun and brought the femme's entire body over his head, slamming her into the floor, which cracked slightly on the impact.

Hayli lay dazed for a moment, trying to shake off the blow as Springer approached. With effort, she heaved herself onto one elbow, watching with a fire in her good optic as her opponent approached. He stepped close to her, looking down.

"Yield." he said. She narrowed her optic at him, not in malice but in cunning, and deftly swiped his feet out from under him. Springer didn't go down, but his unbalance gave Hayli enough time to do a reverse somersault and spring to her feet once more. Amused at her display, Springer charged once more, getting a hard punch in her chest plate and causing Hayli to stagger a step from the pure force of the blow. She reciprocated by swinging a roundhouse kick to Springer's chest, and her bladed heel sliced a shallow trail along his armor.

Hayli jumped for him again, thinking to make him yield to her.

This time he was ready for her and as she leaped, he seized her arm and attempted to throw her over his shoulder onto the ground. It was then that she executed a move he'd never seen anyone do before.

Instead of slamming into the ground like expected, the femme arced her body with the momentum and clutched Springer's arm with her free hand, tightly. She ended up pulling Springer over backwards with her and landing in a tight backbend, which was forced to be reciprocated by Springer. He looked into the femme's one bright blue optic, and she gave a small smirk before wrenching her hand free and grabbing Springer's arm.

In a feat of strength and skill he'd only seen in a few battles and among his own troops, she pulled up from her back bend, hauling Springer's heavier frame with her, and as she straightened, threw him over her head onto the ground in the same manner he'd meant to do to her. Springer groaned slightly at the impact, and Hayli grabbed Springer's sword from the ground as well as sheathing her own. She walked over to the downed mech, placing one foot on his chest and leaning down with a small smile on her face as she panted from exertion. Springer was doing the same.

"Do you yield?" she asked. Springer knew, she'd proved her grit. He nodded, and she removed her foot, doing so much as to offer her hand and help him up. She returned him his sword, and he in turn faced the rest of hisWreckers.

"Whoa... I've never seen anyone go that long against you Springer, save Drift here." Kup said, still holding his cigar between two fingers.

"Well, I drew more blood in my fight if that means anything." Drift said with a smirk. Perceptor smiled from his perch.

"Yes well, I think this femme has more than proved her worth, eh Springer?" he said. Springer nodded, looking at the tough femme that had managed to throw him. He could have continued the fight, but there was no reason to excessively injure each other for a simple test. Even so, as he panted in tandem with his worthy opponent, he noticed his chest plate was oozing a small amount of energon. Hayli also had a thin stream running from the corner of her mouth, his hit to her face had crushed the edge of her mouth into her denta.

"I agree, Perceptor." Springer said, then spat into his hand and held it out. Without hesitation, the femme did the same, the fluid mixing with the blood from her mouth. Springer clasped her hand tightly and looked into her good optic.

"Most important are the rules to being a Wrecker, I can fill you in on those in the near future." he said with a wink. Hayli gave a small smile, the energon stained corner of her lips twitching upwards. Springer raised her hand over her head and turned to the others.

"This femme is one of us now!" he called. "Hayli is now as one of our brothers, I expect she'll be treated as nothing less than family, and I look forward to the advantage of having another warrior at our sides!"

The mechs in the room all raised their fists in the air, congratulating and cheering the femme. All of them gathered round, stacking their hands on top of Hayli's, counting to three and then shouting in unison,

"WRECK AND RULE!"


End file.
